Which Opera Character Are You?

All jokes aside, I woke up this morning with one, dumb thought on my mind: what if I assigned an opera character to every stranger I meet. Whatever my brain was trying to get at, I lost it and can't find any logical explanation to the thought process I went through. I can, however, take an online quiz that will tell me my opera character! 5 quizzes, to be more precise, for the sole purpose of finding out if two different quizzes would yield the same result. They did not.

The first quiz is from QUIBBLO. This quiz was short and painless, but the result made no sense. They told me that I am Mimi, from Puccini's La Boheme; they called me a "hopeless romantic". How they gleaned that information from questions like "what is your favorite color", I don't know.

After that I took PROPROFS' quiz, and they told me I'm Don Giovanni. This quiz was also short, but unlike Quibblo, Proprofs actually used threatening language in their results, accusing me of having "an obsessive hunger for romance" and telling me that I should be wary of my past coming back to "bite" me. I wonder what spirit animal my past has, because that information would be useful for knowing how sharp are said animal's teeth.

HUFFINGTONPOST rubbed me the wrong way when their quiz actually told me what opera is most similar to me, and not an actual character. They made it up immediately, however, when I found out that I am like Mozart's Die Zauberflöte! Exciting, huh. Also, good ol' Huffpost's quiz actually required me to think and consider my answers thoroughly, leaving me emotionally exhausted after taking their quiz.

PLAYBUZZ's quiz yielded my favorite result: Nemorino! Unfortunately, Playbuzz also said that Nemorino lives "in a constant state of bliss" and doesn't have a "real goal in life". I beg to differ. Nemorino does NOT live in a constant state of bliss and  he DOES have a life goal. His life goal's name is Adina, as well as the reason for his NOT blissful state. They also showed me two photos of cats and asked me which of the two cats I liked the best. (spoiler alert: I didn't like either cat)

Lastly came our old friend Buzzfeed, the epitome of online trash articles and useless quizzes. Buzzfeed also managed to segregate the opera characters by gender, making it impossible for me to follow my childhood dream of becoming Figaro. Buzzfeed was also cruel in the sense that they made me choose a Barihunk, and I was stuck between Simon Keenlyside and Nathan Gunn. I refuse to admit to which one of the two awesome baritones I chose. I also had to choose a sidekick, but the sidekicks were actually famous composers and I'm uncomfortable choosing Puccini as my sidekick. If anything, it would be the other way around if I was VERY lucky. Anyways, the result was anti-climactic and I got Bess, from Gershwin's Porgy and Bess. 

At least now we know that these online quizzes are actually unreliable. Learn from my experience and don't waste your precious time on stupid quizzes.